I got the scoop on what every football player needs this holiday season...
Gould needs glasses
How else could you explain Robbie Gould missing 3 FGs in the last 2 weeks?
TO needs a woman
Lets face it, he needs somebody to talk to, to release his pent up aggression and his bodily fluids.
Jim Mora Jr. needs a bodyguard
The coach killer is back on the loose...
Tank needs another bodyguard
Prospective hirees should be 6'4" 250lbs, possess at least 3 firearms and be proficient in Microsoft Excel and distribution of illegal drugs.
Favre needs some uppers
That guy was as dry as dirt talking after the game about his NFL completions record. The venerable and muscular Ed Hochuli informed him of the record.
LT needs some downers
Save some TDs for the playoffs.. playoffs?!?
Vick needs a groin
Good luck with finding that gift, Ron Mexico.
Ralph Wilson, owner of Buffalo Bills franchise
This poor guy needs some revenue sharing, and an ear-job.
Please send all gifts to NFLPA Gift Givers c/o Ralph Wilson, PO Box 30-2, Buffalo, NY.
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