Weekend Wrapup: MLS, EPL, La Liga

My Club America is about to play in 15 minutes, so I better fucking hurry.

EPL

Chelsea is going to get Ronaldinho...next year. Wow. Next year is a long time. Meanwhile, they unload a zillion shots including 13 corner kicks (to Aston Villa's 2) and still lose 2-0. Chelsea boss Mourinho got out-coached as they prevented any pass to Chelsea striker Drogba and played counterfootball. Chelsea fans already crying that they're not going to win the league.

Meanwhile, Liverpool looks like a fucking beast raping Derby 6-0. Man, they look as scary as I said they would muhahahhaha. Here's the top of the table as of right now:

Liverpool, Arsenal, Everton, Chelsea, Manchester City, Newcastle, Blackburn, Man U

For the record, here's mine:

Chelsea, Liverpool, Arsenal, Newcastle, Man U

Oh snap, I'm doing well!

MLS

My friend and I make fun of a guy named Denilson. He was a super-hyped player who was paid the highest transfer fee in 1999 and turned out to be a buttfucking dud. He was all tricks and no goals. He made no one around him better and still holds out for big money. When my friend and I found out he was going to Dallas FC, we pretty much laughed our asses off. Dallas FC clained that there was no bigger signing than Denilson except for Beckham. That is the stupidest shit I have ever heard (you Chicago Fire fans should start laughing now too). So when Denilson made his first appearance in MLS vs. MLS poster boy DC United, I cannot tell you how happy I was for Denilson to see the biggest thing besides Beckham lose 4-0. Good job, jackass.

La Liga

The TV battle for Barcelona and Real Madrid lifted temporarily in the 11th hour and we were treated to two pretty awesome games. Barcelona looked really good with cry baby Eto'o sitting on the bench injured. I was pretty impressed (and scared) of Barca, especially after seeing Ronaldinho bust this as his first goal:



I was like, "Oh snap, Real Madrid is fucked." Then...well...I will let the highlights speak for themselves:



Real Madrid wanted to spend 100M on Kaka, but they got a much better playmaker for cheaper with Sneijder.

In one of the celebrations you see that Ramos takes off his jersey and it says something about Puerta being his brother for life. Well, taking your jersey off in celebration is a yellow card, even if you're doing it in honor of someone who died. :(

I'm off to watch Club America.