Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Earthquake In My Classroom

This isn't a sports post. This is a post about the LA earthquake.

I'm teaching summer school right now (most of you that know me know I teach college and continuation school). They gave me this ESL class where I teach English to mostly fresh as hell immigrants, most from Mexico. I would like to note right now that I love this kind of student because they are the nicest students ever and love America.

So I'm chilling in my classroom and the earthquake happens. What did Patrick N do? Remember all those times I told you Patrick N was for himself and that's it? Some of you thought I was just playing a character. I was one of those people until today. See, the earthquake happens and Patrick N hides under his desk like you're supposed to when an earthquake occurs. Oh. No. I didn't tell the ESL students to do shit. So I'm hiding comfortably under my big ass desk and the kids are like, WHAT THE FUCK DO WE DO WE NEVER BEEN IN AN EARTHQUAKE. WTFFFFFF AMERICAN TEACHERS.

Finally, my class translator said not to panic and told the kids to duck and cover. I thought it was a good time to announce to the class that I needed a hug.

Today they learned the best lesson in American culture. Need help? Fuck you. Help yourself.

4 comments:

Nick Pomazak said...

that is some funny ass stuff...if there was an earthquake here at my job i doubt id even know..i work in a windowless flourescently lit room that is maybe about the size of a walk in closet, and i share it with another guy...all this and i have a masters degree and 20k in student loans so i can pay for a house that is worth less than i owe and i would not be able to sell in a thousand years...remember kids..you can be anything you want to be, as long as it involves making spreadsheets all day..

Patrick N said...

haha I'm in the same boat. 30k school loans, masters, bought a house at 500k its worth 300k now suck my c0ck

Nick Pomazak said...

I think we should move in together and start our own 24 hour sports network filmed entirely out of your basement..we'll each take 10 1/2 hour shifts reading news off the ap wire and each line of last nights boxscores..the other 3 hours of programming will consist of us wrestling each other

Oli said...

I'd watch that.