Friday, November 20, 2009

Too much of a bitch to accept teams that qualify fairly? Why not cheat instead?


When you train for a soccer match, you will always have this premise: you assume you won't have to make a defensive adjustment to defend against a HANDBALL ASSIST FOR A MATCH WINNING GOAL.

After Sepp Blatter said he would LOVE for France to qualify for the 2010 World Cup, France gets a nice seeding when Seppy decides to have a seeding system out of the blue. Then when his team was about to lose, Seppy makes the call and Thierry Henry passes the ball with his hand like they were playing volleyball and William Gallas spikes that shit into the goal. YOU LOSE, IRELAND.

I made a video about Sepp hating instant replay because he wants soccer to still have a human element. By "human element" he means he can still rig matches. Buttfucked the EPL, and namely Chelsea, last year rigging the Barca/Chelsea semis so there wasn't an all EPL final, now he got the country he wanted into the World Cup. Some of you may be like, "BUT PATRICK, HOW YOU KNOW HE RIG MATCHES? IT WUZ JUZT BAD LUX, LOLLERSKATES!!!111" You stupid fuck. Seppy SAID he wanted France to win and he made seeding bullshit to help French fucks out. Why do I have to spell this shit out for you?

Then when even the French were like, "Let's just replay this shit" (direct quote), FIFA was like nah. We got what we want. Why the shit would we have a replay? If I was the Irish, I would show up to the World Cup anyway, hide in a mountain of discarded beer cans from the Irish partying the night before, get their leprechaun machetes ready, and chop Seppy's fucking balls off.

2 comments:

Nick Pomazak said...

This is kind of like how referees in the NFL always cheat for the Steelers...it's like "Oh the Steelers are losing, better start cheating!!" I hate the fucking Steelers. Love seeing Hines Ward look all sad when they lose. As for France, I like France, my Air France flight to Italy was awesome. They give you good meals and free booze even if you fly coach. Yay France.

Anonymous said...

lmfao Italy > France :D What the hell you doing in Italy?! Go watch Inter play