Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Blackouts are fucked up.

Why is this man smiling?

A. He just found out his H1N1 test came out negative.
B. Two girls were his cup for poo.
C. Michael Vick is in charge of his mother-in-law's dog.
D. He just fucked struggling Americans during a recession.


NFL rules require local channels to blackout local games that are not sold out 72 hours before kickoff. There were 9 blackouts last season out of 256 games. Detroit, Jacksonville, Oakland, St. Louis, Kansas City, San Diego, Miami, and Minnesota are in danger of having blackouts this year. So you would think that with a shitty recession year, Roger Goodell would have the heart to drop the rule this year because, after all, these teams didn't electrocute a losing dog or anything. Nope:

"Well, the economy's tough all over the country," NFL commissioner Roger Goodell said while attending a Lions practice at Ford Field last month. "Obviously, it's getting particularly hard hit here in the Detroit area. But our policies are not short-term policies; they're long-term policies. And the blackout policy has been with us for a long time. -detnews.com

So his logic for keeping the rule this year is because it's not a short-term policy. Way to look out for your fans, asshole. People in Detroit are having a hard time putting food on the table for their kids, but fuck it, they need to find a way to put aside some money to go to the games or you don't get to watch an 0-16 team at all. Even more fucked is that local companies buying commercials for these games get super fucked because if their game gets blacked out, the only people to see their ads are people NOT around the area.

So why does a league that depends on fans treat these same fans with no compassion? That's easy:

The NFL doesn't give a fuck about you.

Roger Goodell and the NFL would love nothing more than for your family to starve and suck cock for tickets just to prove that their league is so awesome that people would rather fuck over their own family and suck cock just to see the Detroit fucking Lions go 2-14. The NFL is like that chick that thinks she's a queen and deserves the best things in the world. So she uses all your fucking credit cards and you're stuck taking anal from your dad to pay off your bills. Fuck that bitch.

Sorry, NFL. Los Angeles has moved on to a hotter, younger chick. We don't need your cougar ass and hopefully the other cities follow suit and say fuck the NFL. Here's an idea: find P2P or streaming video and watch the games for free. That's like we dumped you and still get to fuck you while you're not looking. From behind, you look just as good. Hey, we're guys. Pussy is pussy.

1 comment:

dook!e said...


if you can't afford to go to the game, i'm sure you have a 6 gigawatt internet connection so you can stream it at home immediately after the game is over. roger goodell, you are a douchebag.