Transfer Updates: La Liga

I'm writing this from Las Vegas because I have about 3 hours until this show where topless vampires dance around. Dude, I didn't pick the show.

Dog's fine, but if you own a dog, don't be lazy. Get animal insurance. The $20/month per pet will be worth it.

Real Madrid

In (signed): De la Red (Getafe); Javi García (Osasuna); Van der Vaart (Hamburgo)
Out (signed): Cassano (Sampdoria); Balboa (Benfica); Granero (Getafe); Pablo García, Soldado (Getafe)

Their main target, for no good reason at all except selling jerseys, was Cristiano Ronaldo. Man U has pretty much said F U the whole time and left Real Madrid doing nothing during the summer transfer window. 100mil was not enough to get Man U to say yes, so let them keep him. He won't be worth half that next year. Van der Vaart and De la Red cover the mid well enough. All the people they're losing were surplus or unimpressive last year.

Overall In and Out Transfer Grade: B (would be A, but going for C. Ronaldo all summer killed it)

Barcelona

In (signed): Piqué (Manchester United); Seydou Keita y Dani Alves (Sevilla); Martín Cáceres (Villarreal); Pinto (Celta de Vigo); Hleb (Arsenal)
Out (signed): Edmilson (Villarreal); Thuram, Ezquerro (Osasuna); Frank Rijkaard, Zambrotta y Ronaldinho (AC Milan); Giovani Dos Santos (Tottenham); Dimas (Numancia); Deco (Chelsea); Henrique (Bayer Leverkusen); Oleguer (Ajax de Amsterdam)

Barcelona's starting over. What's overshadowing everything in Barcelona's transfer movement is their insistence to not let their best player, Messi, play in the Olympics. The reason is that Barca's first Champions League game conflicts with the Olympic schedule. The highest sporting authority concluded that the club team had a right to hold their players from playing in the Olympics. Messi is already there and plans to stay there. Not like Barca would suspend him. If I was Messi, I would ask for a transfer right now. As for signings, Alves is solid and everything else coming in is in line with going away from the Galactico experiment that Real Madrid proved didn't work. I think losing Giovani is a big loss, especially when he is as good as Ronaldinho.

Overall In and Out Transfer Grade: C- (Free Messi, oh wait, he left, fuck you)

Villarreal

In (signed): Edmilson (Barcelona); Joseba Llorente (Valladolid); Jozy Altidore (New York Red Bull); Eguren (Hammarby); Ibagaza (Mallorca)
Out (signed): Martín Cáceres (Barcelona); Robert Flores (River Plate de Uruguay); Mavuba (Lille); Tomasson (Feyenoord); Leandro Somoza (Vélez Sarsfield); Josemi (Real Mallorca); Jonathan Pereira (Racing de Santander); Damián Escudero (Valladolid); Marco Rubén y César Arzo (Recreativo de Huelva); Felipe Manoel (Huesca); Marquitos (Real Sociedad)

While the EPL has four awesome teams and a bunch of sucky ones, La Liga has two awesome teams and a bunch of pretty good ones. This is one of the pretty good ones. A bunch of solid signings that have them poised to win La Liga. Jozy Altidore is the real deal. People don't think he'll get playing time, but when they sub him in for garbage time, he's going to take a dump.

Overall In and Out Transfer Grade: A-

Sevilla

In (signed): Lautaro Acosta (Lanús); Fernando Navarro (Mallorca); Konko (Génova); Romaric (Le Mans); Javi Varas (Sevilla B); Cobeño (Almería); Squillaci (Olympique de Lyon); Duscher (Racing de Santander)
Out (signed): Seydou Keita y Dani Alves (Barcelona); Boulahrouz (Chelsea); Poulsen (Juventus); Martí (Mallorca); Casado (Recreativo de Huelva)

Facing death of a teammate, this formerly awesome team imploded last season. The poaching started and they've lost major players that they had on the (relatively) cheap, the biggest losses being Dani Alves and Poulsen. The guys Sevilla picked up follow their well scouted youth formula, but, unlike most teams, they did not shop in the Real Madrid "minor league" teams (i.e. good players growing through a team system that hogs the talent but doesn't use it because they aren't jersey sellers). Point? I have no idea what to expect from this team.

Overall In and Out Transfer Grade: D+

One thing about the Olympics. USA bikers apparently were wearing masks when they landed in China because their air sucks, then were forced to say sorry by their USA bosses. USA is about fuck you. Not forced statements. Forced statements are what we fight against.

Ta ta for now. Emphasis on "ta ta."