PORTUGAL 7, NORTH KOREA 0
I was reading my favorite North Korean news site trying to get the Dear Leader's feedback on this ass whupping, but, alas, I couldn't find a recap, instead this was the lead story:
"Revenge-vowing Meetings Held
Pyongyang, June 22 (KCNA) -- Youth and students and agricultural workers gathered in Susan-ri, Kangso District of Nampho City and in Sinchon County of South Hwanghae Province Tuesday to vow to take revenge upon the U.S. imperialists on the occasion of the "June 25, the day of the struggle against the U.S. imperialists".
The reporters and speakers at the meetings recalled that the U.S. imperialists brutally destroyed cities, villages, factories and farms and killed innocent civilians in the most barbarous way everywhere they set their foot during the war of aggression.
They also referred to the shuddering atrocities perpetrated by the U.S. imperialists in Susan-ri and Sinchon in the period of the temporary strategic retreat during the Korean war, denouncing the Yankees as a herd of wolves in human skin and the Koreans' sworn-enemy with whom they can not live under the same sky.
More than half a century have passed since the ceasefire but the U.S. imperialists remain unchanged in their true nature for aggression, they noted in hot blood, adding that the U.S. imperialists are working hard to ignite a new war on this land while linking the warship sinking case of the south Korean puppet navy to the DPRK in conspiracy with the Lee Myung Bak group of traitors.
They bitterly condemned the U.S. imperialists and the Lee group of traitors for totally negating the historic June 15 North-South Joint Declaration and openly holding in check its implementation, thereby pushing the inter-Korean relations to the worst phase.
If the U.S. imperialists intrude into the DPRK even an inch, all the servicepersons and people will mercilessly wipe out the aggressors to give vent to the long-pent up grudge and accomplish the sacred cause of national reunification at all costs, they stressed."
Hmmm, revenge-vowing meetings? Denouncing the imperialists as wolves in human skin? Sinking ships of the puppet navy? Nympho City?? Sounds like my kind of country! Now enjoy this glorious cartoon! It's so much like my dreams it's scary!
CHILE 1, SWITZERLAND 0
Could the Swiss' clockwork like defense strike again, lulling it's opponent to sleep as if they had just drank Swiss Miss hot cooca laced with some of Novartis' finest tranquilizing medicine, as they did to Spain last week?? Nein! Switzerland became the first nation not to concede a goal in 551 minutes of World Cup play (an accomplishment that somehow has not led to any kind of success in the World Cup), but that all ended when Chile sub Mark Gonzalez headed one in the goal in minute 75, giving Chile an insurmountable, Alp-like 1-0 lead. Switzerland played down a man pretty much the whole game, but they don't use any offensive players anyway so who cares. Chile's on top of the group with 6 points, but they still have not locked up a berth in the knockout round. They'll probably have to get a result against Spain because if they don't there will be a 3 way tie atop the group with 6 points each, and Switzerland has Honduras next so they could run up some goal differential there.
Now THAT's Hetero!
SPAIN 2, HONDURAS 0
Well whaddaya know, Spain managed to get thru 90 minutes with mighty Honduras without completely crapping their pants. Also, apparently David Villa challenged one of the players to a duel or something during the match. Trying to get World Cup video is like trying to get aerial video of North Korea, so I had to settle for a close approximation of the transgression shown below.