Thursday, January 14, 2010

Lazy Ass Breaks Silence, World Breathes Sigh of Relief

Hello everybody...I have returned! Patrick parachuted in with a blowtorch and thawed me out of the block of Lake Michigan ice I have been frozen in for the past month or so.

During that time in suspended animation I had quite a lot of time to think, and primarily what I thought about was how I can make this a better website.

I see Patrick has done a tremendous job of updating the sites look, very snazzy! Of course as always he has also been providing excellent content. As for me, I'm changing my style a little bit. What I've been doing for the past 3 years (for realz? 3 years this site has been up? Holy Geez) is doing more long form stuff, mostly in the form of weekly updates. That shit takes a long time to write, and the family of hookworms I have living on and off of my adrenal gland does not leave me with enough energy left over to write like that anymore. Soooo, in lieu of that what you will get from me is more frequent, shorter updates. It will be the literary equivalent of my wham, bam, thank you mam lovemaking style, so I should be pretty good at it.


Lane Kiffin is a mercenary and a punk and really doesn't have all that much on his resume to suggest he is even any good at coaching football. But I guess you can't begrudge him for looking out for his own career and following the money and the prestige to USC. In my mind, there's a much, much more disgusting aspect to college sports and college football in particular which make the whole exercise just a stomach turning charade in my mind.

A few weeks ago there was the big hubbub about Mike Leach and his groovy concussion shed, which I can only guess he uses because he sees it as part of his job to mold his players into "men", which it isn't.

For real, what qualifies a college football coach to teach anyone how to be a man? Because they get to hold the purse strings on the college education of 80 kids, and tell them what to do all day long with unquestioning authority and treat them like dirt, they think they are qualified to teach anyone how to be a man? Uhh no. On the scale of reasons to hate college football coaches, I find "lying mercenary" to be bad, but not quite as bad as "delusional bully", which is where Leach and Bobby Knight and the fired coaches from Kansas and South Florida fall into.

Of course, Kiffin is still kind of guilty of being a delusional bully too, because I've read stories about how he terrorized all the office employees at the Tennessee football program when he first got hired there. Firing and humiliating people because they are obviously not as impressive as he is a human being, and are not the sons of people that have been in the coaching business for 30+ years and have all kinds of connections that allow him to be in the position to be a head coach in a series of high profile jobs despite having had no success in any of those jobs. I guess that's a special kind of delusional.

You hear over and over that pro sports is a business. I applaud them for recognizing that. College sports, on the other hand, pretends it isn't a business. In reality, it's even a more cruel business than pro sports. In college sports, the kids that keep the money flowing are kept in line not by money (because they don't get any) but by fear. It takes a special kind of asshole to keep someone in line when the only tool they have to do so is fear. Judging by recent events there's no shortage of that special breed in college football.

1 comment:

Patrick N said...

seems like site has only been up a month sniff sniff we rule