Friday, January 15, 2010

I'm Back with my.. Alternative Major Newspaper Headline

There's one very good reason I have not contributed to this blog the past year or so. As an Alternate Headline Writer for some major newspapers in the Chicago area, my contract excluded me from writing anything on a public website. While my great ideas were never used in-print, or online, my contract has recently expired and the Bears are not interested. So, those chains are broken, and I'm ready to spill my ideas onto my pants like a warm espresso.

CHIMZAMPESE!
Nothing makes me more excited about the next Bears season like the possibility of a head coach with no coordinators. Zero. No OC, no DC. They are overrated and overpaid. Lovie is so composed on the sideline that it looks like he calls no plays (nothing at all.. nothing at all.. stupid sexy lovie!). That, and the fact that no respected football coach wants anything to do with the Bears ownership, makes me think that we are better off with nobody. But, I guess if we absolutely NEED a coordinator, make it an "uhhfensive" coordinator (skip ahead to 5:25 in the podcast). And who better to serve in that capacity for Ted Theodore Phillips, than Ernie Zampese's offspring, Ken. At this point, a chimp could do the job that Lovie needs.

1 comment:

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